Not every nursing child bites. My child does. It is terribly painful and the single most aggravating part of nursing...thus far.
Biting is more than just a nibble on occasion. Biting is most nursing sessions ending in tears from at least one of us, a blood trail in my bra and just plain PAIN. It's terrible.
What to do? There are a lot of opinions and ideas on ow to prevent the biting, stop the biting and soothe the nipples.
What works? Not much. We have found that if Daddy holds LO upside down she can nurse without biting! I think this is because she has to concentrate. After a minute or so, I can then hold her in the cradle position. Another option has been to sit her on the back of the couch or the balance ball, again she has to concentrate.
In short...it hurts & we are working on it.
Any suggestions, I would love to hear them.
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
Monday, September 19, 2011
Not a quitter
After a wonderful LeLeche League meeting where again my views were wanted, needed and appreciated, I have decided to fight the system. I have never been a quitter, I don't plan to start now. Who is this woman to tell me, a mom of a Beautiful LO, that I am not who they are looking for? She has chosen the wrong person to deny.
Thank you for the support Aimee, Sarah, Cynthia, BrookieLee, Julie & Dottie. It's wonderful to have a support group like you all.
As to the other would-be applicants: We can't help make the world better without pushing the envelope. This particular envelope needs to be busted open. I hope you will reconsider and join me. :) We are WOMEN, we work, we nurse, we LOVE our children....so many more women are out there...let's make them WOMEN!
Thank you for the support Aimee, Sarah, Cynthia, BrookieLee, Julie & Dottie. It's wonderful to have a support group like you all.
As to the other would-be applicants: We can't help make the world better without pushing the envelope. This particular envelope needs to be busted open. I hope you will reconsider and join me. :) We are WOMEN, we work, we nurse, we LOVE our children....so many more women are out there...let's make them WOMEN!
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Rejected
So I have posted that I was applying for LeLeche League Leadership....I was notified by e-mail today that I was rejected as a Leader Applicant. This sucks.
It basically comes down to I work too much (35-40) hours a week and have not followed the LeLeche League principles by working and going back to work when LO was only 6 weeks old. This was a financial necessity for my family.
My opinion is as follows:
1. LeLeche League standards are out of touch with reality.
2. The woman in charge of my decision, was ridiculous.
3. Many new moms are going to miss out on hearing my experiences dealing with:
a) gallbladder issues
b) pumping - daily...multiple times
c) flange size issues
d) mothering choices such as no shots, home birth, solid food choices...etc.
4. #3 makes me sad for myself (I like to talk about obstacles that I have overcome), but more saddend for the new mom that needs to hear "It will be ok" from a mom that has been forced back to work for financial reasons and not regretted it. Hearing "It will be ok" from a mom that has never been back to work, only works very part-time, or the mom that has never had supply issues, just doesn't mean the same.
5. I will find a way to make my breastfeeding knowledge and opinions known to many people, hopefully I will receive an apology letter from LeLeche League along with an acceptance into the leadership process. If not, have no fear, I will figure it out.
Rejection is a hard thing to handle. I am attempting to be graceful and not hateful (it's my default) while allowing myself to move on without this goal in life completed...it's tough.
It basically comes down to I work too much (35-40) hours a week and have not followed the LeLeche League principles by working and going back to work when LO was only 6 weeks old. This was a financial necessity for my family.
My opinion is as follows:
1. LeLeche League standards are out of touch with reality.
2. The woman in charge of my decision, was ridiculous.
3. Many new moms are going to miss out on hearing my experiences dealing with:
a) gallbladder issues
b) pumping - daily...multiple times
c) flange size issues
d) mothering choices such as no shots, home birth, solid food choices...etc.
4. #3 makes me sad for myself (I like to talk about obstacles that I have overcome), but more saddend for the new mom that needs to hear "It will be ok" from a mom that has been forced back to work for financial reasons and not regretted it. Hearing "It will be ok" from a mom that has never been back to work, only works very part-time, or the mom that has never had supply issues, just doesn't mean the same.
5. I will find a way to make my breastfeeding knowledge and opinions known to many people, hopefully I will receive an apology letter from LeLeche League along with an acceptance into the leadership process. If not, have no fear, I will figure it out.
Rejection is a hard thing to handle. I am attempting to be graceful and not hateful (it's my default) while allowing myself to move on without this goal in life completed...it's tough.
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
A change in mindset
I woke up today with a flood of memories. 1 year ago LO was born! HAPPY BIRTHDAY! These memories made me sad...sad for all the moments in time I missed being a working mom, sad for the times she won't need me anymore because she is growing up, sad for the times when I could put her down in one spot, go to the bathroom and come back and she still be there....
I was discussing this feeling with a friend during my lunch pumping and decided I needed an "attitude change." I have been able to change my way of thinking for a long time (very helpful when I am nervous...I tell myself that those are EXCITED butterflies.). So I decided: I'm not sad for things past, I'm very excited for what is coming!
So today is a HAPPY DAY!
Thank you Sarah.
Here is a picture of LO Loving icing :)
"Icing" you question????? Typically I'm not a advocate for youngsters eating this type of crap, but on a birthday, I guess it's ok. I planned for the fall out of a lifetime. I planned on puke, diarrhea and diaper rash, but was pleasantly surprised....she was fine! The icing even came out of her pretty dress.
I was discussing this feeling with a friend during my lunch pumping and decided I needed an "attitude change." I have been able to change my way of thinking for a long time (very helpful when I am nervous...I tell myself that those are EXCITED butterflies.). So I decided: I'm not sad for things past, I'm very excited for what is coming!
So today is a HAPPY DAY!
Thank you Sarah.
Here is a picture of LO Loving icing :)
"Icing" you question????? Typically I'm not a advocate for youngsters eating this type of crap, but on a birthday, I guess it's ok. I planned for the fall out of a lifetime. I planned on puke, diarrhea and diaper rash, but was pleasantly surprised....she was fine! The icing even came out of her pretty dress.
Monday, September 12, 2011
LeLeche League - Applicant
Below is an e-mail exchange. I am attempting to become a LeLeche League Leader (LLLL). They are questioning my working and breastfeeding beliefs...how did I do? My answers are in BLUE.
Dear Ruth,
I do appreciate your sentiments on this topic. Its up to you if you would like to answer the below questions. If you prefer not to, I more than understand, but then I cannot start your Application for Leadership. LLL does not have a hard and fast rule about working moms. Every situation is unique and LLL wants to know the details in order to make a fair assessment as to whether a potential Applicants meets the prerequisites for LLL Leadership.
Warmly,
Janna
Information about time apart from the baby
How early did separation begin (the age of your child)? 6 weeks
Were you able to provide a gradual transition from being with you to starting work? No
What was your average weekly work/travel schedule? How many hours at a time were you away from your baby? I work 35-40 hours a week. Liath is at daycare (we call it school) from 8:30-4:00 M-F....so 8.5 hours a day is 42 1/2. I drop her off and my husband picks her up. Some days are shorter, but never longer.
How flexible were those hours? Could you go to the baby or home if called or take some time off if baby had a fussy day? I am VERY fortunate to have the most flexible job I've ever had. I work for a small Law Firm in Overland Park and am a legal assistant. The job is Super felxible because the attorneys are only in the office 25 - 30 hours a week because of court and such. The other reason is that my mom is the other assistant. She is always willing to stay later or come in earlier if I need/want to have some extra time. ANY time the baby needs something, I'm in the car...it is not a question of "When can you leave?" It is always, I'll be there in 20. That being said, it has only happend once...LIath is a very healty and happy baby!
Could the baby be brought to the work site or could you take some work home? On occassion I have brought Liath to work, however this is not an ideal situation. I have brought work home, but there is nothing that is at the office that cannot wait unitl I get back or be done by someone else.
Are you currently experiencing regular separation from your child? SEE ABOVE
What is your current average weekly work/travel schedule?
How many hours are you away from your child?
How flexible are your hours? Can you go to her as needed?
If you are not currently experiencing regular separation, what age was your child when regular separation ended? This is an on-going event. M-F
Sensitivity to baby’s needs:
How have you met your baby's needs for food and comfort? Liath nurses on demand (except when I am at work). We co-sleep so she nurses throughout the night. FOOD: We are very careful to limit what she has been exposed to, however, she is a very good eater and has enjoyed learnig about food.
Was/Is there any regular reliance on bottles or formula? Liath has had NO formula! From 6 weeks to 10 months she had three 4oz bottles at school. At 10 months we slowly changed to two 4oz sippy cups.
How was it determined that your baby was ready for the amount of separation involved? Family's financial need.
How has your baby’s needs been met if they were sick? As I mentioned above, if Liath is sick, cranky or just needs extra snuggles, I take the day off.
How have you handled separation if your baby needed you? There has not been a time when she needed me, that I have not been there.
How has your baby handled the separation (both as baby and now)? Liath LOVES school! Some mornings she wakes up a bit cranky (don't we all) and when I ask if she wants to "get dressed for school?" She lights up...smiles and giggles start!
LLL Philosophy in light of your personal experiences:
What would you say to another mother experiencing a situation similar to your own, whose baby was unhappy with her absence? I would say every baby and evey mother is different. Also, different ages will change how the baby feels about this sitution also. Sometimes the choosen school is not the best. Is it possible for you and your partener to change up your schedules? Maybe if you could lessen the time away from either you or your partner, it would be less stressful to the baby. Have you ever attempted or thought about co-sleeping? I have noticed that Liath LOVES to snuggle, rather than be up with her all night wanting to snuggle and then both of us being cranky the next day, we co-sleep, she snuggles and nurses all night. We both sleep better. If this is something you are interested in learning about and/or exploring we have a great book in the library "The Family Bed."
Or a mother who worked and was concerned her baby wasn’t breastfeeding well?
The health of your baby is number 1. We know that a breastfeeding baby is best, so let's think about how to work on making nursing better. When is the baby nursing? When did you last pump? If it has been more than 2 or 3 hours since you have pumped, your nipple might be too big for the baby to get ahold of easily (especially when they are small). If this is the case, either offer the breast earlier, or hand express some milk to lower the milk level. Are you concerned because your baby is waking up more in the night? If this is the problem, maybe he/she is needing more snuggle time to help encourage longer more satisfying nursing. If the nighttime is the biggest problem, try a warm bath togehter where the baby can nurse as he/she pleases. The warm water is soothing and will help both of you relax. Remember the more stressed you become, the more your problems you will start to have with supply.
Dear Ruth,
I do appreciate your sentiments on this topic. Its up to you if you would like to answer the below questions. If you prefer not to, I more than understand, but then I cannot start your Application for Leadership. LLL does not have a hard and fast rule about working moms. Every situation is unique and LLL wants to know the details in order to make a fair assessment as to whether a potential Applicants meets the prerequisites for LLL Leadership.
Warmly,
Janna
Information about time apart from the baby
How early did separation begin (the age of your child)? 6 weeks
Were you able to provide a gradual transition from being with you to starting work? No
What was your average weekly work/travel schedule? How many hours at a time were you away from your baby? I work 35-40 hours a week. Liath is at daycare (we call it school) from 8:30-4:00 M-F....so 8.5 hours a day is 42 1/2. I drop her off and my husband picks her up. Some days are shorter, but never longer.
How flexible were those hours? Could you go to the baby or home if called or take some time off if baby had a fussy day? I am VERY fortunate to have the most flexible job I've ever had. I work for a small Law Firm in Overland Park and am a legal assistant. The job is Super felxible because the attorneys are only in the office 25 - 30 hours a week because of court and such. The other reason is that my mom is the other assistant. She is always willing to stay later or come in earlier if I need/want to have some extra time. ANY time the baby needs something, I'm in the car...it is not a question of "When can you leave?" It is always, I'll be there in 20. That being said, it has only happend once...LIath is a very healty and happy baby!
Could the baby be brought to the work site or could you take some work home? On occassion I have brought Liath to work, however this is not an ideal situation. I have brought work home, but there is nothing that is at the office that cannot wait unitl I get back or be done by someone else.
Are you currently experiencing regular separation from your child? SEE ABOVE
What is your current average weekly work/travel schedule?
How many hours are you away from your child?
How flexible are your hours? Can you go to her as needed?
If you are not currently experiencing regular separation, what age was your child when regular separation ended? This is an on-going event. M-F
Sensitivity to baby’s needs:
How have you met your baby's needs for food and comfort? Liath nurses on demand (except when I am at work). We co-sleep so she nurses throughout the night. FOOD: We are very careful to limit what she has been exposed to, however, she is a very good eater and has enjoyed learnig about food.
Was/Is there any regular reliance on bottles or formula? Liath has had NO formula! From 6 weeks to 10 months she had three 4oz bottles at school. At 10 months we slowly changed to two 4oz sippy cups.
How was it determined that your baby was ready for the amount of separation involved? Family's financial need.
How has your baby’s needs been met if they were sick? As I mentioned above, if Liath is sick, cranky or just needs extra snuggles, I take the day off.
How have you handled separation if your baby needed you? There has not been a time when she needed me, that I have not been there.
How has your baby handled the separation (both as baby and now)? Liath LOVES school! Some mornings she wakes up a bit cranky (don't we all) and when I ask if she wants to "get dressed for school?" She lights up...smiles and giggles start!
LLL Philosophy in light of your personal experiences:
What would you say to another mother experiencing a situation similar to your own, whose baby was unhappy with her absence? I would say every baby and evey mother is different. Also, different ages will change how the baby feels about this sitution also. Sometimes the choosen school is not the best. Is it possible for you and your partener to change up your schedules? Maybe if you could lessen the time away from either you or your partner, it would be less stressful to the baby. Have you ever attempted or thought about co-sleeping? I have noticed that Liath LOVES to snuggle, rather than be up with her all night wanting to snuggle and then both of us being cranky the next day, we co-sleep, she snuggles and nurses all night. We both sleep better. If this is something you are interested in learning about and/or exploring we have a great book in the library "The Family Bed."
Or a mother who worked and was concerned her baby wasn’t breastfeeding well?
The health of your baby is number 1. We know that a breastfeeding baby is best, so let's think about how to work on making nursing better. When is the baby nursing? When did you last pump? If it has been more than 2 or 3 hours since you have pumped, your nipple might be too big for the baby to get ahold of easily (especially when they are small). If this is the case, either offer the breast earlier, or hand express some milk to lower the milk level. Are you concerned because your baby is waking up more in the night? If this is the problem, maybe he/she is needing more snuggle time to help encourage longer more satisfying nursing. If the nighttime is the biggest problem, try a warm bath togehter where the baby can nurse as he/she pleases. The warm water is soothing and will help both of you relax. Remember the more stressed you become, the more your problems you will start to have with supply.
Monday, September 5, 2011
Camping
The weather here in KC has FINALLY turned nice....actually BEAUTIFUL! So, my hubby and I decided to take advantage of the holiday weekend and pull out the tent. This is the first time we have camped with LO, so we kept it close to home....really close...the back yard. We learned a number of things:
#1....Fire is FASCINATING....LO loved looking at the fire...so much so that she didn't want to go to sleep. :(
#2....Queen size air mattress...not big enough for LO, Mommy & Daddy to be comfortable on :(
#3....air mattress FUN to crawl on.
#4....I am so glad that for the first time camping we decided to stay in our own back yard....at 4:00a.m. LO and I went to our normal bed....just wasn't comfortable. This was a good thought, one we plan to repeat this coming weekend.
#5....stupid dog barks all night (sorry neighbors)...she barks all night because the stupid dog behind us barks all night. Shutting one up (mine) helped keep the other quiet.
#6....coffee tastes better when made on a campfire, but coffee made in the auto coffee pot tastes pretty good when sitting by a morning campfire.
#1....Fire is FASCINATING....LO loved looking at the fire...so much so that she didn't want to go to sleep. :(
#2....Queen size air mattress...not big enough for LO, Mommy & Daddy to be comfortable on :(
#3....air mattress FUN to crawl on.
#4....I am so glad that for the first time camping we decided to stay in our own back yard....at 4:00a.m. LO and I went to our normal bed....just wasn't comfortable. This was a good thought, one we plan to repeat this coming weekend.
#5....stupid dog barks all night (sorry neighbors)...she barks all night because the stupid dog behind us barks all night. Shutting one up (mine) helped keep the other quiet.
#6....coffee tastes better when made on a campfire, but coffee made in the auto coffee pot tastes pretty good when sitting by a morning campfire.
I have always been told that camping with a nursling is great and easy...I agree on a few different points: #1, nursing is so easy...much better than the measuring and mixing bottles....#2...not so easy if co-sleeping....just saying.
Friday, September 2, 2011
A sad event - A reflection
Yesterday, September 1, 2011 should have been my cousin, Jennifer's due date with her 5th baby, a boy named Andrew. At 17 weeks gestation Jennifer's water broke and their was no way to save the baby. After 3 days of drugs to induce labor and then to cause delivery, Andrew was delivered already gone. It was the saddest week I can remember. There were so many complications that the fact that Jennifer was able to carry him 17 weeks is amazing, but 17 weeks is not enough.
Yesterday we as a family, across the United States released balloons with notes. This release was more than just balloons, it was a release of all the anger, pain and jealousy we have been holding inside for 23 weeks. Jealousy? Yes, I admit I am jealous of Andrew, he is pain free, sitting in heaven with all of our passed family and watching us, waiting.
Yesterday was not has difficult as I had imagined, in fact it was quite easy to release that balloon. The hard part was Tuesday when I wrote the note and yesterday driving to the park and a song played on K-Love about being strong enough because God is with you and he is strong enough for both of us.
I don't talk about it much on the blog, but I am a very prayerful person. I find myself praying for the dummies on the highway every morning (better than cussing at them). This life of prayer and reflection is new for me. I recently did a bible study that encouraged constant "prayer"...more of constant communication. It has really made me think differently about my relationship with God and my savior.
As this is September 2, I move on from my day of reflection, but I wanted to put it in words for anyone and everyone to read...it's kind of therapy for me. Anyway, until next time...
Yesterday we as a family, across the United States released balloons with notes. This release was more than just balloons, it was a release of all the anger, pain and jealousy we have been holding inside for 23 weeks. Jealousy? Yes, I admit I am jealous of Andrew, he is pain free, sitting in heaven with all of our passed family and watching us, waiting.
Yesterday was not has difficult as I had imagined, in fact it was quite easy to release that balloon. The hard part was Tuesday when I wrote the note and yesterday driving to the park and a song played on K-Love about being strong enough because God is with you and he is strong enough for both of us.
I don't talk about it much on the blog, but I am a very prayerful person. I find myself praying for the dummies on the highway every morning (better than cussing at them). This life of prayer and reflection is new for me. I recently did a bible study that encouraged constant "prayer"...more of constant communication. It has really made me think differently about my relationship with God and my savior.
As this is September 2, I move on from my day of reflection, but I wanted to put it in words for anyone and everyone to read...it's kind of therapy for me. Anyway, until next time...
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